Changing Stiles Read online

  “What you up to?”

  “Nothing. I’m at my parents’. Sunday dinner. They gettin’ on my nerves so, I’m ‘bout to bounce.”

  “Think about what I said, bighead,” Tyree jokes as he exits the kitchen, leaving me to chop it up with Justin.

  “Who was that?”

  “My cousin. Wassup? What are you doing on this good Sunday night?”

  “I was hoping to kick it with you, Ma. You wanna catch a movie, go skating, bowling, my crib to chill?”

  I glance down at my watch. It's only six; I have a couple hours to burn. I don’t want to be around other people, though, so, his house is fine. Maybe a walk on the pier down Delaware Ave would be cool. The way I'm feeling, we'll be fucking if I go home with him.

  “We can walk the pier and talk.”

  He laughs. “You want me to come scoop you?”

  I know he tryna fuck just for the simple fact that I haven't let him hit yet. That bothers the ish out of him. He slick as shit and screwing him gon' cause the drama he claims that won't. And he ain't even tryna be in love with me.

  Carter is, a nagging voice reminds me. I do want love and have it love me back, right? Just don't go. The sensible part of me warns.

  “I drove but you can come get me if you want. My parents live in Cheltenham. Right off Old York Rd.”

  “You gon' let me meet your peeps?” he suggests.

  I shrug my shoulders. My parents would be cool with it. “Sure. Why not?” I give him the address and wait for him to come get me.

  Within thirty minutes, I hear his music before he even calls to say he is outside. I peek out the window. “Aight, I'm out. Bri, I'll see you this week. Bye, bighead.” I mug the back of Ty's head.

  My mom jumps up, coming to where I am at the window. “You're leaving without eating dinner, Lieas?”

  “You can at least tell the nigga to turn the music down, park, and come in,” my dad advises, his eyes never leaving the football game. The Eagles were winning for a change.

  “Tell him to come in and have dinner,” she offers.

  My cell phone rings and instead of answering, I open the front door and wave for him to come up.

  “So, you gonna be the type of girl who run when they beep the horn and hit you on the cell phone? Huh?” The disdain drips from my dad’s words like overflowing water.

  I sometimes am that type of girl, which annoys me more. The disappointment is so clear in his eyes. He shakes his head. “Loud ass music. No respect,” he adds, just as the music stops.

  It is loud as hell; you could hear the bass dumping.

  I shake my head. My dad is gonna be ramming, so I grab my jacket from the closest and punch my arms into the sleeves. Just as Justin walks up to the door, I step out into the late September air. His eyes widen in surprise as I grab his hand and pull him back in the direction of his car.

  “I'll call you, Ma.” I flag my hand towards my mom in a negligent wave.

  “I guess meeting them is out,” Justin surmises.

  “Let’s go,” I order, the cool air caressing my cheeks.

  He’s eyeing me to see if he can read me. The heat of my annoyance burns him. There’re always casualties in war. My sanity is currently one.

  I slip into the leather passenger seat of his cranberry Nissan Maxima after Justin opens the door for me. He frowns. “Are you cool?”

  “I’m fine,” I respond. He goes around to get into the car and smiles at me. “What are you tryna get into?”

  “You,” he laughs with a nod. He turns the volume back up in the car stereo, and it picks up on the chorus of one of my favorite songs.

  ...from the center to state property.

  Uh. Young Chris in full effect and all I need is one reason just to pull this burner cause y'all told me to go next and I'ma be goddamn if I'ma give my turn up.

  Young Chris in full effect and all I need is one…

  “Hot, right?” he smiles.

  Yes. Philly rappers are on the map. Freeway, The Young Gunz, and State Property had all been signed to Roc-a-Fella records. Proud of them just because they’re from my city, and they had skills. I was really hype, waiting for the Young Gunz to drop their upcoming album. The neo-soul movement was popping too. Musiq Soulchild and, not to mention, Jill Scott are all getting crazy airplay. But I wasn't trying to take no long walks with him.

  “You rhyme, right? We can hit the studio and fuck around for an hour if you want?”

  It was a great idea, but I wasn’t in the mood for none of that. When I'm all revved up, my blood starts boiling; as embarrassed as I am to admit it, sex has the power to calm me down.

  “Nawl, let’s go to your place.”

  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  Carter

  Sundays are for family. Growing up, we would alternate between my grandma's, my aunts’, and my parents’ crib, or a restaurant. So, Sundays pretty much mean church, family, food, and football since I was a kid. I generally swoop in somewhere after church but before the food. They’re grilling in the backyard, taking advantage of the last days of nice weather. And today for some reason, every one of my siblings manages to make it, along with two of my aunts and one of my uncles on my dad's side. My family is huge and is always in each other's pockets and business.

  Vincent even brought a date with him. I think it is to make Mariah jealous. Autumn is still pissed that he's acting shitty to her best friend. This is the reason friends and family don't always mix.

  Poor little Riah, I thought. Can't figure his angle, though. He has been halfway in love with her since she was like sixteen. Whatever it is, I hope it gets worked out. Sometimes, Vince could be such an asshole.

  The sun starts to go down, making its descent into the distant sky. The moon would be full and massive. Amazed by the beauty of nature, I watch mesmerized. My mom turns the stereo on and the smooth grooves of old-school R&B filled the yard.

  From my spot in the doorway, I watch my brother-in-law Jackson pull my very pregnant sister Vanna up for a dance. She giggles as she swirls to the sounds of Keith Sweat's Make It Last Forever. He is singing and joking with her. Ole’ boy got pipes and rhythm.

  I love seeing her happy. Family means everything to me. And before I met Alieas, I wouldn't have even been all extra sentimental, but seeing my sister and her husband so in love stirs something inside and makes me immediately think of her.

  I turn at the sound behind me and am surprised by Autumn's other best friend, Amaya. I let her by and I don't think much her nudging my shoulder with a secretive smile.

  It’s only when she turns back and looks up at me. She tilts her oval face to the side and grins. “Are you still seeing the girl you brought to the skating rink?”

  Cautiously, I stare at her. “Why? Wassup?”

  She shakes her bangs out if her eyes and starts, “Well,” leaning closer to me so she could whisper, “I thought since you were dating again, maybe we could go out?” she offers.

  I guess I missed whatever signs had come before this. “Umm,” I chuckle, unsettled. I glance down at her and have to remind myself that I watched her grow up. “Lil' Maya, Vonn and Vanna used to babysit you. How would I look going out with my baby sister’s best friend?”

  Her chocolate eyes roll as she quietly sucks her brace-covered teeth. “I'm a grown woman, Carter,” Maya confidently asserts with a sultry smile.

  Admittedly, her body has developed in a way an older brother figure shouldn't notice. She’s Onyx-stripper built, but the bubblegum pink of the rubber bands on her braces shouted BABY, not to mention, the girl is damn near family. I’m content with Lieas and don’t need anything or anyone extra. Sparing her feelings, I simply reply, “Yeah, I am.”

  Maya shrugs her slender shoulders. “Well, let me know when that’s over. I’ve been crushing a long time,” she confesses and walks off. Completely thrown off, I just stare after her. She is thinner than I like my women, but she does have a fat ass. Guilt has me looking around the yard to see if anyon
e witnessed our exchange. I catch Vince’s eye, and his dumbass is giving me the thumbs-up and a cheesy-ass grin.

  Shaking my head, I laugh.

  “Don't be tryna put your voodoo dick on my friends,” Autumn warns me from behind and mugs the back of my head as she walks by.

  I stare down into my cup to rid myself of the memory of Maya's bubble walking away in her Apple Bottom capri pants. “Hey, she came at me.” Holding up my hands in surrender, I tell her to relax and that I’m not interested. Rubbing the back of my neck, I lightheartedly admit, “Lil’ Maya grew up, though.” I quickly sip some of my mom's homemade lemon iced tea.

  Autumn playfully slaps my arm and shrugs. “She swears it’s open season. In her defense, she has had a crush on you since we were twelve.”

  All of this is news to me. Then she dramatically grips my forearm. “Please don't fuck my friend.”

  I almost choke as I spit out some of the iced tea. “Wrong brother. You should have warned Vince not to mess with Mariah. What’s up with that?”

  We both glance over to where Mariah is standing. She is giving Vince the death stare, alternating with sad doe eyes.

  “I don't know. Your diva ass brother is too needy. So… yea. It’s a damn mess,” she spills the details.

  “Where is ‘new girl’?” my oldest sister Vonn asks as she comes over to us. My sisters are like the police.

  “Her name is Alieas, and she kicking it with her family tonight,” I explain.

  “Oooh. I thought I was going to get to see your eyes sparkle as you moon all over her.” She lights up like a tree and grins widely.

  “Whatever, girl.” They all extra hype that I’m dating again.

  “So, I saw Malika the other day, and she said that Toya is pregnant again and that she supposedly moving back up here. That bitch try to contact you?”

  Before I can even respond, Autumn frowns and butts in, “Don't talk about that trifling hoe.”

  I shake my head. “Nawl. She don't have my number. And I ain’t interested in anything she has to say.”

  “I just wanted you to know that she might pop up. I still owe that bitch a ass-whoopin’. So, just know that if we ever cross paths, I’m kicking her ass.”

  Agitated, I shrug. I need room to move. “Vonn, I don’t give a fuck about that girl.”

  My mood all messed up. My eyes roam the yard ,searching for Mira. I spot her tucked under my mom’s arm, sitting on her lap. She spots me and my heart melts.

  Determined to get to me, she wiggles out of my mom's grasp and comes barreling towards me. I am amazed. My heart, in human form, is gunning in my direction. “Daddy!” she giggles on unsteady legs as she covers the distance between us. “Daddy!” she gushes again as she gets closer.

  Autumn and Vonn both clap and cheer her on. “Come on, Mira. Come get him.”

  I step off the porch just in time catch her as she lunges into my arms. “Hey, Bug. What were you doing?”

  “Sitting with Granma.” She points to where my mom is sitting with a couple of my aunts and uncle. “An’ Pop-Pop.”

  “Let her show up,” Autumn grits out. “It’s the fuck on,” she finishes, punching her one hand into the other fist.

  “Oooooh!” Mira places her hand over her mouth, knowing her auntie just said a bad word.

  Autumn diffuses the situation and starts kissing all over her face, making noise and tickles her out of my arms. She dances away with her, “bad word” now forgotten.

  Vonn softens up and hugs me. “Watch out for her, bro.”

  Of course, I will. I will protect and lay down my life to keep my child safe, even from her own mother.

  The hug is not successful, though, at comforting any of my shattered nerves. My mind is racing as I run about ten different scenarios through my brain. None of them ended with Latoya being happy.

  “Fuck outta here,” I murmur absentmindedly into the breeze, wishing I had a cigarette. It was a bad habit I'd quit when Mira was born.

  I need something to calm my nerves. I pick grab my phone to call Alieas and I see that I missed two of her calls. I dial her number but there's no answer. I text and wait a while and still no response.

  I guess I’ll eat some cake and go sit with my parents who are surely reminiscing about the “good old days”.

  Ten

  Alieas

  Carter called again last night for the third time as I was climbing into bed. I ended up turning my phone off so I could get my story straight.

  I had to get my mind right. I debated answering and just telling him the truth. Hadn't I spent my entire life spouting, ‘Honesty is the best policy’?

  Fuck that; if I tell him that I'm involved with another man to the extent that it has me ignoring his calls, he'll fall back. Fall off the face of the earth, and I won't be able to find his ass with a flashlight in the daytime.

  I want him. I enjoy his and Mira’s company, but sometimes, I'm emotional and impulsive. And just plain stupid. I do impulsive shit all the time like shopping and spending money I don't have. Eating shit that’s not on my meal plan or conducive to my new healthy lifestyle. Or Being intimate with one person while I’m trying to build something with another person.

  Shit. I need a list of pros and cons for each man. What the hell am I even talking about? Justin's ass is Disney World. While amazing and fun, Disney is a vacation. You ride the rides and see a few attractions then you take that ass home. It is a fucking visit; it’s impossible to fuckin’ bring Magic Kingdom to Philly. Carter is the house in the gated community; home. The place you want to be at the end of every day. The place when you get tired of the vacation and you want to lie in your own bed.

  Yes, bitch; home.

  I had to stop playing young girl games if I want a home. If I want him to be my home. And honestly, he is both. I love his mind. He makes my juices flow. The timbre of his voice leaves me entranced, and I love it. His voice is like the tips of his fingers trailing slowly over my skin, making goosebumps appear and the tiny hairs stand on end. I can't wait to hear it while he’s inside me. I’m ready now, so I’m just not sure why he hasn’t attempted to get all up in me yet.

  It has been months, so maybe something is wrong. I don't know anyone who has ever waited this long to have sex with me. Just ‘cause I'm a hot ass doesn’t mean that he’s supposed to be too. And just because he isn’t trying to jump my bones don’t mean shit.

  We flirt with each other constantly, but still, nothing has happened. He hasn't even peeked at the pussy. I haven't had a glimpse of the dick, other than the sweatpants dickprint. And yes, he is packing!

  Wait; he can't possibly be home if the dick is whack. And at this point, I have absolutely no idea if its whack or not. I highly doubt it, but what if it is?

  There’s only one way to find out.

  The thought of him fucking me thoroughly as he has done in my dreams has me biting my bottom lip. Appreciatively, I hum aloud.

  “Dick must be good,” Nesha jokes.

  The comment stops me midstride on the elliptical. Forgetting I’m at the gym, I open my eyes to see her grinning over at me. I should be working these stank ass pounds off instead of worrying about anything. This last twenty is trying me.

  “Wait… What?”

  “You moaned. Out loud. And your eyes were closed,” she supplies easily, “And… I am working out here,” I disagree.

  Nesha laughs as she swishes quickly on the elliptical. I want to tell her to increase the resistance, but I don't get a chance to before she continues, “Sounds more like you getting worked out.”

  “I wish,”.

  Her mouth opens and she raises her eyebrows at me in question. “You mean you haven't done it yet with either one of them?!” she exclaimed with a look of utter disbelief on her face.

  I frown slightly; I should be offended; she says it like I just give it up all the time. But then again, based on my past experiences, she should have reasonable doubt. I'm not offended, though.

  “Nothing with C
arter. I let Justin eat me out, though.”

  “But you like Carter more, though, right?”

  I halfway love Carter. “Yea. I’m fucking up. And I don't need you to go all lovey-dovey on me or be extra virtuous or preachy.”

  “Me?” she inquires with a dramatic hand to her chest.

  “Yes, you, heffa.” She always has that way of voicing exactly what she's thinking, regardless of whether or not you want to hear it.

  “I wasn’t going to say nuffin'. So, what's wrong with him?"

  “Nothing is wrong with him,” I defend, wiping my sweaty face with my hand towel.

  “You like him but you haven't had sex?” I'm sure this has to be a crime in her book. “But you let the other boah taste it? You trapping backwards. I’ve listened to you go on and on about wanting marriage and babies, best friend. But I’ve also seen you do things that suggest otherwise.”

  Here she goes. I knew there was going to be a well-intentioned speech lined up somewhere. I tilt my head as I wait for her to deliver it.

  “I’m just saying that you should see where it goes with Carter if you want Carter. Now, if you want Justin, you should see where that goes. The only place you will end up seeing where it goes with both is trouble.”

  “It’s not that serious," I lie. I don’t feel like hearing shit I already know.

  “Riiight,” she laughs.

  “I’m saying Justin is fun. I don't know if you would understand. He's free and can just pick up and go. Whenever he wants,” I shrug. “And as far as Carter goes, he has Mira and on top of that, we're both looking for something special, and sex would probably mess it up.” Then I get cocky and add, “If I give him some ass, I may never be able to get rid of him.” It is hardly like I want to. And it probably the other way around.

  Nesha laughs. “I forget that your shit is good like that,” she jokes, out of breath.

  “It is. You remember when I used to mess with Kevin. Before we started having sex, he used to try and play the shit out of me. As soon as I started giving him the good— good, I couldn't get rid of his ass,” I laugh. It was the truth. Is still the truth; I still can't get rid of him. I drink some water from my water bottle to prevent from choking.